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"Keys To Improvement," from my FREE monthly newsletter

From the How to Train a Horse Series:

"How many times do you think you've ridden your horse? A thousand? Five hundred? Just guess. What if every time you got on, you improved something, no matter how small? If you could just see some little improvement for each of those thousand times you've been on that horse, that's a thousand percent improvement. After all, you can't get the horse trained all at once; the key is to make some small improvement every time you get in that saddle. Your mindset, when you get in that saddle, is that something is going to get better. Now, it might not be what you'd planned on working on because it's not a matter of what you want to work on that day – your horse decides for you. You may want to work on your right lead, but the horse says "No, I'm just going to run away." So you may not work on leads at all; you may just work on..."

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From John Lyons Trainer Keith Hosman

Round Pen First Steps
A Downloadable Book

A sample from Day 3:

"Again, your goal is to keep the horse in one place, to not scare him so much that he takes off, but to get a little reaction out of him each time. But what to do if he scoots away? If he moves off just a few steps, you'll simply ask for an inside turn, bring the two eyes back onto you and start again. Be on the lookout, though, for the horse that moves off then pauses as if he's thinking "maybe I should stay." That's a very good sign. Our lesson is starting to sink in; he's thinking. When that horse returns to you make sure you praise profusely. If he takes off and makes it a quarter turn or more around the pen ask for an inside turn and be careful to bring him back in the direction from which he took off. (That is, if he takes off to your right, don't allow him to return from the left following a run around the ring. Make him turn inside and come back from your right.) If he tears off at a million miles an hour, let him go, but push him through several rotations. Make him understand that dodging off is not the answer, in fact, it means more work. Dissuade this with a handful of laps around the pen. Be very careful to not allow your horse to get in the habit of simply running a lap, then coming back to you. That's not going to force change in his mind."

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"How to Help Your Child Set Goals at Horse Shows"
Written by Kathy Keeley

Copyright © 2008 Kathy Keeley

One of my favorite teachable moments for parenting and horse showing is helping kids learn to set goals. Horse showing provides a great opportunity for young children to watch you set and achieve goals, for older children to participate with you in goal setting, and for teens to set their own goals in conjunction with you.

Much of horse showing is all about setting and achieving a goal. The goal can be one that you set for the season, like riding well enough to move up a class or jump height, qualifying for end-of-year finals, or braving the chaos in the schooling ring. Or, it can be as simple as setting a goal for the day , like to ride your best, improve on your hands or shoulders for an EQ class or improve your attitude with your horse or trainer.

With young children, horse showing is a great opportunity to role model goal setting. You may discuss a goal with them or share a goal that has been discussed by the trainer. As a parent, you can share what it will take to achieve the goal and what the costs of hard work and time it might take. You can help set milestones along the way and show how to amend or change the goal if it becomes unrealistic.

With an adolescent child, it is the perfect time to work together. The best approach is to have a prior conversation with a trainer and set some parameters or expectations. As a next step, set up a three-way meeting with your child and the trainer to establish some goals for training and showing. Again, share some milestones and try to be clear about what it will take to achieve the goal.

With an older teen, your role may change to the active listener, with the teen and the trainer setting the goals and then involving you in the discussion. It is important to help teens fully understand the link between a goal, hard work, determination and follow-through as well as failure, disappointment and barriers that may crop up.

Winter Circuit is a great time to work on goals. Many families go somewhere out of town, usually for a two- or three-week time frame. Even though you may only go for a long weekend, time seems to flow much more slowly at these shows. Winter Circuit shows are less intense for many trainers, which provides an opportunity to have some longer conversations with trainers and children.

I've discovered that there is often more bonding time at Winter Circuit shows. For example, those long times of waiting for the next class can be a great time to pick up the conversation on an important topic. And, trainers seem more relaxed at Winter Circuit shows because horses are usually purchased, the trainer is in a nice warm place, and no one is earnestly chasing points or qualifying for medals.

What are your show goals for the year? What can you role model for your children and what can you use as a teachable moment? How can you help them learn how to set a goal, manage both the achievement and the disappointment, and then learn an important life lesson as preparation for adulthood?

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Veteran show mom Kathy Keeley is founder of ShowMom.com, the first online community created especially for horseshow mothers and daughters who want to learn how to successfully navigate the horseshow circuit and maintain a great mother-daughter relationship. Get our free horseshow packing list when you sign up for our free email newsletter, The Savvy Show Mom, at ShowMom.com.

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